There are, of course, other people carrying the surname Cmar in this world. One of them is my brother, who in this video gives an excellent accounting of what inspired him to enter his current legal career, and why he does what he does. Suffice it to say, I am proud.

Previously:

• Cmar is also… Central Maine Animal Rescue
• Cmar is also… Croatian Metal and Rock
• El Cmar, technico

And so, it has come to pass that we find ourselves in “awards season”, wherein fond looks are taken back at the prior year in media, and trophies are doled out for various forms of perceived excellence in movies, television, and music. Much attention is showered upon the festivities and celebrities involved, and much ado is paid to the recipients of said awards. That noted, the Grammys last weekend made one thing glaringly clear – beyond his inability to competently carry a tune or strum a guitar, Justin Bieber cannot grow an award-winning beard.

Now, it is time to give awards to those who can.

Every November, whoever shows up to shave and post a select group of Overlords and Minions come together to sacrifice facial smoothness for mammary health. The annual How Not To Grow A Beard Month event has grown from a mere bit of National Novel Writing Month inspired silliness, into a somewhat larger bit of silliness that has raised nearly $8000 over the past two years for breast cancer research. HoNoToGroABeMo 2010 was the largest yet, both in terms of total donations and number of participants. Pete DiLillo and his lush man-thicket ended up dominating the donation race, earning him the title of current, reigning, and defending Champion of HoNoToGroABeMo. Witness his half-shorn shock:

Oh the horror!!, image by Pete DiLillo via HoNoToGroABeMo.org

Bob’s recap sums up the experience, and as a participant, I will add my own effusive thanks to all who donated. Their generosity for our boob-buffoonery was amazing.

All that said, it is time to bestow The Cmar Beard Awards for HoNoToGroABeMo 2010. These have nothing to do with any donations received, and everything to do with the glorious pictography of crackling virility hedges:

• Best Beard Photo: There were many entries during the month that stood out for creativity, humor, or photographic skill, but the trophy for best beardy picture goes to Jim Van Verth for Day 14: Abra-abra-cadabra. The facial contorting, posing, and expression convey that he’s not only gonna getcha, but he’s gonna getcha in a way you may never recover from. This is Mr. Van Verth’s second year in a row winning this category, so step it up, gents.


I want to reach out and grab ya, photo by Jim Van Verth via HoNoToGroABeMo.org

• Man Most Exemplifying How Not To Grow A Beard: One might think that this would be the closest category to judge, but that turns out not to be the case. Even though he allowed his neck beard to stay strong this time around, for the second year in a row, Jeff Greiner takes the prize. C’mon gents, step it down and give him some competition.


One year ago today, image by Jeff Greiner via HoNoToGroABeMo.org

• Best Time Lapse Photo Series: All participants were varied in their choice of poses on a daily basis, but only one of us had enough consistency of follicular posture and backdrop to take this category. Jason Penney, that would be you! (Click through to view the slideshow.)
• Man Most Exemplifying How To Grow A Beard: As noted above, the ability of many of us to generate a thick face mane is somewhat surprising. While several of us were in the running, Adam Johnson gets the award by sprouting a 30 day untamed jaw jungle, even after some judicious trimming.


Got the shrubbery all trimmed on the neck, image by Adam Johnson via HoNoToGroABeMo.org

• Best Use Of Non-Facially Generated Props: Our overall champion, Pete, also is the obvious winner in this category, both for framing his beard on a daily basis with an endless supply of amazing headgear (click through for the slideshow), and for this epic hat-gasm on the final day:


Clearly I never win at Tetris, image by Pete DiLillo via HoNoToGroABeMo.org

• Daily Commitment To The Task: November is a busy month, and few find the time and the stamina to start on Day 1 and produce a post for all 30 days. Our founder, Bob, led the pack in this regard as he does each year, and finds himself co-accepting this award with Jeff, Pete, Jim, and Jeffery for 2010.
• Best-Spun Beardy Yarns: Everyone strove to lay down some manner of words each day with their posts, and a few of us were able to tell some good tales. However, as clearly as he showed us how not to grow a beard, Jeff Greiner blew us all away with his sincere and excellent beardy yarns each day. With topics ranging from gaming to education, they are well worth your time to read.

Congratulations to all of the winners! To all the participants, it was a pleasure joining you once again in this endeavor, and to give recognition where recognition is due. To everyone else, I’ll merely note that only 257 days remain until HoNoToGroABeMo 2011, and this whole mad affair will start up again.

Beards Are Evil, cc by-nc image from jwelcher on Flickr

One of the worst side effects of my recent blog-neglect has been that I have not promoted, at all, my second year of participation in How Not To Grow A Beard Month. Today is the last day to donate, so if you can, please do – it’s for the excellent cause of funding research into curing breast cancer.

Scour the site, especially my own pics, and give generously if you are able. Both the beards, and the boobs, will be grateful.

• Bro continues his analysis of the environmental, social, and political fallout from the latest episode of the Asian Carp/Great Lakes debacle.

• If there’s one sport we Cmars know, it is the glorious pinnacle of human contest known as ice hockey. Uncle Ed is specifically a student of the Columbus Blue Jackets, and has divined the key to their success.

• My in-laws, Marv and Liz Knasel, will be heading to Gettysburg, PA, this weekend with other members of the Ohio Valley Civil War Association to do living history, including firearms and live-fire cannon demonstrations. While I’ll be away in San Antonio, Laura will be visiting the battlefield, so be sure to stop by if you can – ’tis always a fun and educational time. Did I mention live-fire cannon demos? I think I did.

• Out of my Tumblr: Arc Attack Plays Iron Man, xkcd does Online Communities again, Grover does Old Spice, and the Russians provide an unintentionally post-apocalyptic image.

• Over on the GLF, I get caught up with the CSA shares, and experiment with the forbidden joy of hard vintersquash.

The Miskatonic University 2010 Australian Expedition has returned. I was not mind-jacked by Yithians. I did have a scare in which I was sure I was being attacked by flying polyps, but they were merely birds – friendly, if a bit aggressive:

more birds, image via jvsquare on Flickr

The trip was a blast, while the post trip jetlag was less so. Autopsy reports, of course, will be forthcoming.

How was your September?

Matt Wallace and Mur Lafferty, cc by-nc-sa image from nlowell on Flickr

• That shift in the universe you felt this past weekend? Yup. That was reality taking a moment to revere the birth-anniversaries of Matt and Mur, as is only right and proper.

• Even though Balticon feels like it ended only a few days ago, ReConStruction and Aussiecon 4 loom ever closer. I must prepare. You may tremble if you choose… it is recommended.

• Over on the GLF, I’ve been chronicling our new-to-us foray into community-supported agriculture through Breezy Willow Farm. Also, an interesting coupon experiment, the ridiculous End of History, and hoppy education have also been noted.

Janet Biggs: Nobody Rides for Free, via Janet Biggs on Facebook

The San Diego Science Festival is going on as I type this, and will be bringing the awesome with SCIENCE all this week. A bit of context from their site:

The San Diego Science Festival strives to create exciting and interactive experiences that showcase the remarkable science of greater San Diego, a community recognized as one of the Nation’s scientific leaders. Our wide variety of programs and events inspire all ages, with a special focus on building a pipeline of future scientists and STEM thought-leaders.

The University of California, San Diego is lead organizer for the second annual San Diego Science Festival (www.sdsciencefestival.com), a week of community events designed to focus awareness on the importance of science, technology, engineering and mathematics (STEM) education. This year’s Festival will take place March 20-27, culminating in a Science EXPO Day at PETCO Park on Saturday, March 27.

The Festival’s EXPO Day is planned to inspire San Diego’s youth to pursue science-oriented education and careers. Parents and families are encouraged to attend, as are all members of the San Diego community. With the theme of “Excite Your Mind,” EXPO events will include over 150 hands-on science exhibits for attendees of all ages, a Rubik’s Cube Speed Tournament involving 45 local school teams, a science-inspired art show and even the dissection of real brain specimens. Last year, over 50,000 people took part in the San Diego Science Festival EXPO Day activities alone.

Amidst the amazing number of events going on, I am vastly tickled that Laura has been invited as a guest to host the Star Party tomorrow night! Behold:

In addition to hosting the Star Party (including a discussion of the latest news about the James Webb Space Telescope) tomorrow, Laura will also be speaking about Citizen Science at the massive Expo Day on Saturday. For details about these and all the other excellent activities, check out their site, hit them up on the Facebook, and follow them on Twitter. Most importantly, if you are in the area, stop by and bask in the radiant beauty of SCIENCE.

• Amazon and McMillan publishing had a bit of a tiff over the weekend. While this has inspired much commentary, I will point you to Charlie’s analysis of the business, Tobias’s look at the author-based economics of eBooks, Cory’s take on the art v. money of the publishing issues involved, Matt’s glorious rant in response, and John’s deconstruction on how Amazon is seventy-times seven-times a heavyhanded corporate dick in this whole affair.

• Apple also happened to announce a shiny new thing this past week. Ken encapsulates exactly why I’d want one, while Chris examines why the iPad (and, to a lesser extent, the entire Apple product line) are less “computers” and more “appliances”… and why that may be a bad thing.

• At the risk of inducing a recursive weekly roundup loop, it seems that Overlords Johnson and Miller are starting up a Friday Minion Roundup feature on the retooled Secret Lair site. Everyone involved is stupefyingly talented, which makes this an imperative thing for you to check out.

• Jim has threatened to hit us with a weekly dose of critical gaming links on The Vintage Gamer, and he is making good on said threat. The only thing more interesting and awesome than the information he’s corralling together is Jim himself (which sets said bar orbitally high), so I command you to go and read.